The Hemphill County News (Canadian, Tex), Vol. 2, No. 18, Ed. 1, Friday, January 12, 1940 Page: 1
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W
This Little Alfie Was
Too Tough for Army
HAMILTON ONT Alfred Crapp
Who is only 18 Is apparently even
too tough for the Canadian army
Crapp was convicted of stealing a
bicycle but Magistrate Burblgo
granted deferred sentence when
army officers testified that accused
had enlisted and that they could
use him In the army
A few days ago city police re-
ceived a call to go to the armories
jThere somewhat chastened officers
lied them to Private Alfred Crapp
who was pacing a cell surrounded
by guards Alfie it appears had
been a very bad actor and the offl
icers wanted to get rid of him They
stated that they would dishonorably
discharge him from the army The
police officers looked cooperative
Ipursed their lips clicked their
tongues then pounced on Alfred
i and bundled him into a Black Ma
irla
Magistrate Burbldge gave Alfred
six months in tho Ontario reforms
tory
eOimOm
t byMMMips
We got one great break In
this Christmas business
hero was no dispute about the
right date
Well theros Just an outside
chance that in a day or two Junior
can get those electric trains back
from poppers possession
It would seem to some observers
that a lot of German ships ore suf-
fering from the illusion they are
undersea boats
To have interned the Graf Spee
would have meant that she might
have deteriorated badly Berlin
Dispatch Blowing her to bits keeps
her in fine shape you understand
Mr Selznlck declared the film
Gone With the Wind took about
four hours but would not be cut
News item
Wanna bet
MORE ABOUT THOSE HATS
How to tell whether the snood Is
part of the hat or the hat part of the
snood Is a majordlfllculty In cither
case It gives a woman the appear-
ance of having become tangled in
some mosquito netting while putting
on her bonnet
J3U1J the snood Isnt entirely
to blame for the csmlo angle In
1039 millinery Its he hats
themselves They have gone
babyish They look like hose
little things that used to be used
as ornaments on birthday cakes
The Idea seems to be to get an
adultlnto a hat designed for kinder-
garten wear
TTfl have seen old fashioned pen
wipers that would make ideal ton
nets for mines and ladies wear
this season
Anything goes as long as it Is
four sizes too small and good for a
laugh
S tUn4 b becoming peered
because the German bombers
arrlro se eften daring lunch
hoar Those Germans seem to
have m XdM whatever of eti-
quette
Bill McElreath
Shot Monday
Bill McElreath of Gainesville
Tex a son of Mrs Lola McCraw
and a brother of Ferry and Jerry
was shot in the neck and stomach
Monday He Is In a critical condi-
tion
Forger Is Too Polite
Adds Mr to Check
HAMILTON MONT A ranch
hand was arrested here because
he was too polite
He wrote a check payable to
himself and signed It Mr Har-
old Hagcn his employer
The mister part of tho sig-
nature aroused the suspicion of a
bank teller
J C Born is able to get around
with the aid of crutches
The DIonne quints have five type-
writers Just wait until Doc Dafoe
Is asked to change the ribbons
Germany Is now weakening pits
ener beer in its economy drite
Careful now theres a Umit to
everything Adolft
rnoriiECY
The marriage of Stalin and Hitler
of course
Sooner or later will end in divorce
Edna G Grosltln
DISTRICT ATTORNEY DEWEY
of New York Is out for the presi-
dency Its going to mean plenty of
trouble if he finds out politics Is a
racket
OBSERVATIONS ON THE OPERA
The conduct of Carmen
Was truly alarm en
She deserved what she got
When put on the spot
The Barber of Seville
Has unusual skill
In arranging affairs
For people in pairs t
But Ive often suspected
His own business was neglected
Rebecca Richmond
5 i r
Morris A Blltzcr hopes the Rus-
sians will find that what they have
taken are Finns of the mickey type
t
PSYCHOPATHIO WARD CASES
Case No I
Middleaged stranger who cant
remember his name Semlhysterl
cal condition Constantly cries
Oucht Stop UP and You got
mel When not pulling covers over
his head demands that he be allowed
to hide In closet Has numerous
wounds cuts and abrasions Diag-
nosis Probably a parent with three
or more male children two of whom
got bows and arrows and air rifles
for Christmas
Case No XI
Pfaff Mr and Mrs Felix E
about 23 years of age were brought
to psychopathic ward together in-
state of complete nervous collapse
Can get nothing from them except
the words Never again Dtagno
sis a young married couple who
didnt know any better than to give
Junior a drum
Case No III
Unidentified man white SI says
he Is one of the Van Swerlngen
Brothers covered with adhesive
tape and temporary Red Cross band-
ages talks incessantly and unintel-
ligibly about crossovers yards
freight depots and main lines
And from time to time demands
Wheres tht ambulanceT Didnt I
tell you there was a big wreck
Diagnosis Obviously has been play-
ing with Juniors electric train set
ever since 0 a m Christmas morn-
ing
Famed Writer
Starts Today
it i fiiillips
H I Phillips is the outstanding
humorist writing for newspapers to-
day His column The Once Over
will be carried in The News each
week during 1940 provided you like
it If you dont we will replace it
with a regular column by Gen Hugh
S Johnson former NRA administra-
tor
Naturally these big writers charge
plenty we pay cash for ail pictures
cartoons stories jokci etc we use
and it is only through the splendid
support given this paper by its ad
vertisers that we are able to carry
them Lets patronize those Cana
dian merchants whose steady adver
tising makes this paper possible
YOU ARE INVITED to inspect
our wedding and mourning station
ery Also our birth announcements
with both blue and pink ribbons So-
cially correct finest vellum paneled
Envelopes to match The News
CHINESE ELMS All sizes Jun-
iper arborvitaj blue spruce Shrubs
Laubhan Nursery Shattuck Okla
Matthews Child
In Hospital
Little Nancy Lee Matthews 7year
old daughter of Mr and Mrs R N
Matthews underwent an operation
for appendicitis Wednesday
NOTICE No more copies of last
weeks Cronology of 1939 are
available The News Adv
nfa
OiiceOm
imps
The funny side of world
affairs expressed in the
inimitable way that only
H I Phillips can offer
Mr Phillips provides for
our readers each week a
sparkling satirical review
of national and world
news events He writes in
an original way about a
little of everything from
the big city traffic police-
man to presidents and
kings with a laugh in
every line
A weekly laugh with
Phillips will give you a
brighter outlook on life
in general
QW fa
LARGEST CIRCULATION IN HEMPHILL COUNTY 1173 COPIES WITH 5865 READERS
Vol II
HEMPHILL COUNTY MEW
The Only Paper With Complete Coverage in Both City and Country
CANADIAN TEXAS FRIDAY JANUARY 12 1940
No 18
Slingshooting Farmer
Drops His Blackbirds
WICHITA FALLS TEXAS
Thanks to a couple of oldfashioned
slingshots Farmer Virgin Jones
saved his maize crops from the
blackbirds while neighbors all
around him were losing theirs
Jones rigged up the slingshots for
himself and son Billy Ray seven
years old when swarms o black-
birds descended on their maize
fields Mrs Jones and two children
were the ammunition train keep-
ing cloth bags filled with pebbles
and relaying them to the artillery-
men
For four weeks they patrolled the
field almost from dawn to dark
keeping the blackbirds on the move
Finally tho discouraged birds left
Frigid Vigil
1
A Swiss army sentinel Is shown
at his barbed wire surrounded post
near the German border Since the
ontbrcak of European war the army
of Switzerland has been fully mobi-
lized and at Us defense post
Red Top
Service Station
PHONE 9505
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Miller, Othello Ontje. The Hemphill County News (Canadian, Tex), Vol. 2, No. 18, Ed. 1, Friday, January 12, 1940, newspaper, January 12, 1940; Canadian, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth47127/m1/1/: accessed May 15, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu; crediting Hemphill County Library.