The Alamo Star (San Antonio, Tex.), Vol. 2, No. 3, Ed. 1 Saturday, September 16, 1854 Page: 3 of 4
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i 854.
THE ALAMO «TAlt.
=ri=
TOO HONEST.
Scene 1.—"Mr. Slocum, I belieft^r 1"
."Yes, sir; James Slocum.'*
1 Some months ago, Mr. Slocum, you gave
me credit for a~pair of bouts—price five dol-
lar*. I have now called to liquidate the de-
mand*"
"Owe me five dollars 1 Well, really, I have
no remembrance of the fact."
r> Be .that as it may, the debt is honest, and
mnvt be paid."
Here the middle-aged man, in pepper and
and salt cassimers, took out a well filled pock-
et book and handed SloCum a twenty dollar
bill. Slocum balanced aecount, and handed to
the middle-aged gentleman in the seasonable
wearing apparel, fifteen dollars, being the bal-
ance on the boots.
The middle aged gentleman left, while Slo-
cum went off in a reverie.
"Welt, the vsqpiW is not sobad after all; —
here at least is one honest man. ~I will never
speak ill of the human family again."
Scene *2.— An Exchange Office—Enter Slo-
cum.
Bullion runs over the pictured blotting book,
and throws out a twenty dollar bill..
"What's that for 1"
"Not worth a cent—one of the new counter-
frits—came ont yesterday."
Sloeurfi once more goes into a reverie.
"Curse thai scoundre l ! That's the very bill
that honest man paid me yesterday for them
boots. What a vile world. . I don't believe that
there is one upright man on earth."
Slocum left for the pólice office to enter a
complaint, _
Á traveler in England obseivingá peasant at
work, and séfhig he was taking it remarkably
easy, *a id ;
"My friend, you don't appear to swfcát*any."
"Why, no, mister, six shillings a wlelt aift't
sweating wages."
A fellow seeing a farmer's boy riding a mis-
erable edd horve, asked him:
"What's that hcrse out of, sonny 1"
"Out of condition," said the lad, grinning.
A reverened gentleman, while visiting a par-
ishloner, had occasion in the conversation to
allude to the Bible, and on asking for the ar-
ticle the ma«ter ran to bring it, and came back
with two leaves of the book in his hand, s*?Y-
r . .
ing, "I declare that's all we have got in the
house. I had no idea we were so near out."
■ ' ^ i""« ' ■ ■ ~
i. a. glasscock.
We have just received intelligence of the
death of Jas. A Glasscock, Esq., of California.
Mr. Glasscock was one of the "oUiTexians"—
and one of the Micr Pi ¡sutlers, and one of -the
first editors of the Western Texan.— 7Yre .
A more reliable, upright and honorable man
than Jas. A. Glasscock we have never known.
H is death will cause deep regret among the
old settlers, who stood in Texas like so many
pioneer towers—men with whom he served in
the field or was associated with in business.
Por ourselves we know of no man whose loss we
would more sincerely deplore.
The printer, ranger, editor, is no more !—
the soldier, the patriot sleeps his last slumber.
May his rest be as peaceful as his life was
usel'u!.■-—itustin Tiftws.
POSTRY
Prom the Trae Americaa.
AMEBICAW , WHY IM71MMSB I
Americans, arise, arise,
Tuata . Vammh.h. ÍIki'bipt*,—To prevent
beer from becoming flat—Drink it the minute
it f* set before you.
To preserve vegetables.—Pickle them in a
jar of turpentine. Nobody will aek to eat it.
Ti preserve flower seed.—Don't sow them.
A very honest chap i Boston, who wishes
to sell his horse, advertises it as follows ;
For sale, a brown horse, with a Roman nose,
in fine condition, and fond of traveling-shav-
ing run-away fóur times within a week.
A couple of Bowery B'hoys being caught in
a thunderJ^uall in the bay, Tom, who was
very frightened, said to his companion in per-
il : "I say, Mose, can you pray I"
"Not a bit," was the answer.
"What t" says Tom, "can't you say a pray-
er of no sort V
"Not a word," was the laconic reply.
"Then," says Tom, "some thing must be
done, and that d....d quick !"
—.... ...... —.—
UTWe clip the following paragraph from
that truly excellent paper,.the Columbia Dem-
oeHit:
Tuk Aí.*mo Star.—No. 17 of this little sheet
is before us. This little luminary is one of
the lesser magnitudes, but its light is neverthe-
less o
A good deacon making an offieal visit to a
dying neighbor, who was a very unpopular
man, put the usual question—
"Are you willing to go, my friend V
"Oh ves," said the sick man.
"1 am glad of that," said the deacon, "ior all
the neighbors are willing, too!"
The lady who did not think it respectable to
bring up her children to work has lately heard
from her two sons. One of them is a barkeep-
er on a flat boat, andrfie other is figuring ai
steward of a brk*k vard.
Shake off the drowsy chain ;
Thy pale and ambient skies
E'en now doth glow with sham*
The foe, too plenteous, now are
And yet they come—still come-
A bloody scene—ala , i fear,
Must be this land—our home.
Americans, why slumber, now t
Thy couutry needs thy aid;
Why would ye to vile Papists bow,
Or see thy country's glory fadet
if not, then quickly. I entreat,
Defend the land wnleh freedom gave ;
Proudly go forth thj foe to meet.
And every danger braye.
. r
Americans, wbfUleipi
There's work for eterjr man j
Better, far, waühffel virgils keep
Of our own native land.
Then one and all be watchful,
The foe are ail around ua j
Heaven does reward the faithful
And will with glory crown ns.
Fourth July Toatt.—
Here's to the man
That owned the land
That raised the corn,
That fed the goose,
That bore the quill
Some gallant defender of Lr la Montci re-
cently wrote, "She is pure innocenec/* The
wicked types, however, printed itt "She is pure
in no sense.
I^IPAn elopement took place the other day
which caused some consternation A dog ran
away with a newly married man* rib —orbcef.
That wade the pen
That wrote .the Declaration of Indepea*
dence. ¿
si iwbi. liii1ijij,———
There is a sign in a very ambitious village
not sixty miles from Gotham which reads very
distinctly, in large letters, " Meat Market;**
and underneath, in small letters—"Also, all
kinds of Sausages !** This latter strikes as as
being decidedly suggestive.
run s wn 11 run 111
'♦Let thos« nowIs ugh who never laughed before,
And ih««e who slwsys («ugh now tsogS Ümi mors."
UK YAMKEE NOTION ft la acfcnowl-
edged by its one hundred and fifty thousand
readers to be the best, cheatfrst, and iltoa*iher
the Funniest paper in the World.
The Notions is now in its thirifr volume, and
has a larger circulation than any illustrated
paper ever published in the Vnited States. It
is the best selling periodica) in the
its immense and rapidly increasing cii
a burida ntly*.tes4ÍIU s. Ea<
from Fitly to One Hundr
tions, in the h
ed and engri
tinent, while
-Mi
Tu.—The cloture of the tea plant has been
introduced into the United States, and thoae
planters who hare tried the experiment, hare
succeeded beyond their highest expectations.
That tea can he grown successfully in Cardi-
al, Georgia, and Florida Is ateost certain.
rat style
Ftfv the "
An eminent artist—American, of course,—!???* wtoíle «e Liten
lately painted a «now-.torm o natnrally, «hat I ^"^Bon^Moti Hit.
he cntight a bad cold by tilting near It with* Repartera, WíUieUn , and
iÉfliÉ tdf, - . 1 • •• -■ . \:;l micalitics, Yankee Potto
able and paying exception
tent ion. A large anbecrf
made up in every City, to
the United States, and the
pub) t*her offers the
iyTne following anecdote i*{ieraily true:
Methodist deacon arose in meeting to '«tell
his experience,** and said,u the detft la a roar-
ing lion, going about seeking whom he
dctatULL blessed he hit holy name t"—
"1 , "■1 «"i• .it ■■
"Please, Mr. Smith, pappy wants to know
if you won't lend htm the model of your hat 1"
•'Certainly, my son, what (or 1M
"Be wants to make a scare-crow to keep the
corn oil of our turkey-buxzarda."
With a small Investment,
museo cyerymonttiwi
ft can he forwarded to re«
•t t Vet* trifling poatace. j So,
hundred, and send you order* to
PnhUaltedfcjr T. W
Price
*5 per
a. *
fSP
nwr > way -
14 ccMfi ptt bootber.
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Newcomb & Lambert. The Alamo Star (San Antonio, Tex.), Vol. 2, No. 3, Ed. 1 Saturday, September 16, 1854, newspaper, September 16, 1854; San Antonio, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth176991/m1/3/: accessed June 3, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu; crediting The Dolph Briscoe Center for American History.